Monsterz Revenge Review

Normally, we’d advise you not to meddle in the affairs of monsters, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. But when giant fast food franchises threaten to thicken the waists of folklore’s most frightening beasts, that’s a pretty good reason to pick up your iPhone, enter the social world of Monsterz Revenge, and tell your new monster friends exactly what to do in order to survive.

Monsterz Revenge takes the prize for the most baffling premise to set up a social game. Deep in some spooky graveyard, several well-known monsters are enjoying a cookout, when all of a sudden their fun is interrupted by a mass immigration of big-name fast food outlets, including “Taco Hat” and the heavily defended “Burger Fort.” As a monster with a talent for cooking, you must run your own establishment in hopes of staving off gentrification.

Coffee!

You begin the game as a lowly zombie cook, though you can upgrade your avatar to different monster personalities as you progress. Some of these monsters include Dracula, the Wolfman, the Mummy, and even an adorable superdeformed version of Death. Each monster brings different talents to the game, most notably the ability to whip up tasty gore-themed dishes. Nachos and slime– yum.

Cooking is the primary way to earn “Monster Coins,” the in-game currency in Monsterz Revenge. Each dish takes a certain amount of time to prepare, from mere minutes to hours. When the food is done, ghostly customers will consume the repast (shouldn’t it go right through them?) and leave money for your efforts. If you’ve decked out your restaurant with scary decor, you’ll get a big tip.

Many social games doom the player to waiting around for hours while the game’s key task grinds away at making money, but Monsterz Revenge does you a kindness by providing you with several mini games that help you fatten up your cash reserves. For instance, there’s a game that lets you shock the Frankenstein monster to life by tapping certain color patterns. The most notable minigame, however, involves slamming your spooky car over and over into the numerous fast food joints that dot the landscape. You can up your car’s power and defense, which is necessary, as the dudes who run the establishments don’t go down without a fight. Tacos hit hard.

Don’t wake dad.

Otherwise, your time in Monsterz Revenge is spent upgrading your grills, cooking food, increasing the size of your restaurant, accessorizing it, hiring new employees, and stomping flowers that have the audacity to grow in your graveyard. You’ll also need to capture random humans who stumble into your restaurant (no shoes, no slime, no service) and turn them into the energy that’s necessary for your monster to function in the game.

Said energy can take a long time to recharge, so any way you slice it, a good chunk of Monsterz Revenge still requires standing around and waiting for things to happen. Of course, the waiting problem can be fixed through convenient microtransactions that let you pay cash money to finish a task in seconds instead of hours, but taking shortcuts doesn’t grant a very strong sense of accomplishment.

Gameplay-wise, Monsterz Revenge doesn’t tread new territory; there are other social games like it, most notably Capcom’s Lil’ Pirates. But if you’re looking for a social experience with less “Yarr!” and more “Boo!”, Monsterz Revenge will creep you out in all the right ways.

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