Hector: Badge of Carnage Episode 1 Walkthrough Online

The funny folks at Straandlooper want to give you a hand with their game Hector: Badge of Carnage, but they’ll still make fun of you for asking for help. A walkthrough in the style of Hector, the game’s surly main character, is now available online. Some examples of Hector’s cutting remarks can be found ahead!

Like some classic adventure game walkthroughs, this Hector walkthrough reveals only the degree of hints you’re looking for. These are the intros to the first two parts of the game:

Part 1: The Cell

Well, stuck on the first room, are we? Tut tut, you sad pathetic drunk in moth-eaten yellowed underpants (and I’m not talking about the game here). Let’s see if we can at least get you out of the starting block before you assume your usual submissive role of “quitter”.

Part 2: The Station

I love that look you get on your face when you’re frustrated. Fat, pouty lips, crossed eyes, eyebrow furrow deep enough to hide a German soldier in, acne-flecked skin pockmarked with anger and twisted into a hideous sneer of confusion… oh, that’s just your regular face. Sorry.

For more helpful heaps of abuse, head over to the Hector: Badge of Carnage walkthrough here.

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